Elsewhere in your letter you mention that you’ve been following your doctor’s advice to have an X-ray every year — and I commend you for this. God gave our bodies to us, and He wants us to do everything we can to take care of them.
What exactly is it you think God is doing to you? Perhaps you’d answer by saying He’s giving you cancer — but that isn’t true. First of all, you don’t even know if you have cancer, and you won’t know until it’s been confirmed by further testing. But also, cancer is an evil disease — and God isn’t the cause of evil. We live in a world where things go wrong, and God may permit them to happen, but He isn’t to blame for them. The Bible says, “God cannot be tempted by evil” (James 1:13).
But let me suggest what God may be doing to you — and that is sparing your life. What if this is cancer, but it remains undetected and untreated? You know the result, and God doesn’t want that to happen. Your fear is understandable, but God doesn’t want you to be paralyzed by fear.
Instead, turn to Christ and find new strength in Him. He loves you and will never abandon you, no matter what the future holds. “So do not fear, for I am with you… I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you” (Isaiah 41:10).