This is part 5 of our Summer Series on walking through life’s valleys. Read the rest of the series:
Part 1: The Cure for Anxiety
Part 2: When Death Takes Someone You Love
Part 3: Why Does God Allow Suffering
Part 4: When Your Love One Is Addicted
Forgiveness can be an emotion-laden word, perhaps because it is at the foundation of all our relationships—with God, with others, and with ourselves.
God’s Forgiveness
When we have fallen into deep sin, it can be difficult to understand why or how God could forgive us. But the Bible assures us that God is willing to forgive our sin when we have submitted our lives to Jesus Christ. In 1 John 1:9 we read, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
Billy Graham has said, “God’s forgiveness is not just a casual statement; it is the complete blotting out of all the dirt and degradation of our past, present, and future. The only reason our sins can be forgiven is that, on the cross, Jesus Christ paid their full penalty. [But] only as we bow at the foot of the cross, in contrition, confession, and repentance, can we find forgiveness.”
What must we do to receive God’s forgiveness?
Repent. This means owning up to what we have done—and turning away from our sin: “For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight” (Psalm 51:3–4, ESV).
Ask for forgiveness. “For Your name’s sake, O Lord, pardon my iniquity, for it is great” (Psalm 25:11).
Remission. Like a debt that has been covered by someone else, the penalty for our sins was paid by Jesus. “This is My blood … which is shed for many for the remission of sins” (Matthew 26:28).
Purification. The very essence of forgiveness is that we are totally cleansed from our sins. “Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. … Hide Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” (Psalm 51:7, 9–10).
Reconciliation. When God forgives, we may still suffer consequences for our sin. But through forgiveness, the separation between us and a Holy God is bridged, and we can then enjoy God’s complete love, acceptance, and friendship. God is always in the business of “reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespass against them” (2 Corinthians 5:19, ESV).
Forgiving Yourself
You may be dealing with guilt and fearful feelings from your past. Bondage to the past prevents you from experiencing freedom in the present. This is not God’s will for you; He desires that you experience abundant life (see John 10:10)!
The secret to forgiving yourself is found in accepting God’s forgiveness for you. When you are tempted to look back on your past sins and condemn yourself, remember how God Himself thinks of you: “I will forgive their iniquity, and their sin I will remember no more” (Jeremiah 31:34).
Forgiving Others
Colossians 3:13 says, “Bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.”
At times, we may not “feel” like forgiving those who hurt us; however, forgiving is a choice, not a feeling. God is grieved and angered by our sins (see Psalm 7:11), yet He chooses to forgive us. We must do the same with each other. Matthew 6:14–15 says, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
When you choose to forgive those who have wronged you, you are not saying that what they did was right; neither are you excusing their sin. Instead you are releasing them to God and letting Him deal with their offense. You are no longer holding their sin against them.
The Danger of Unforgiveness
If the choice to forgive seems too painful, consider that the alternative—not forgiving—will bring you infinitely more pain. Unforgiveness creates a barrier in your relationships with others and with God; it can lead to depression, burnout, physical problems, broken relationships, and bitterness.
God commands us to forgive others because He loves us. He wants you to experience the immense freedom and joy that come from forgiving, instead of the pain and bitterness that unforgiveness brings.
Moving Forward
- If you have never asked God to forgive you of your sins and surrendered your life to Jesus Christ, do so now. If you have already turned your life over to Jesus Christ, make your relationship with Him primary in your life (see Matthew 6:33).
- Examine your heart for ways that you may have wronged others, and then seek their forgiveness. (see Psalm 139:23–24).
- Make a choice to forgive others who have wronged you. If you do not feel that you can forgive, ask God for the willingness to do so.
- Actively put behind you those things which hurt you, and refuse to bring them up again.
- Spend time each day reading God’s Word and talking with Him in prayer. This will be a great help to your spiritual growth.
- Get involved in a church that lifts up Jesus and the Bible. Find a small group where you can regularly meet for Bible study, prayer, and fellowship.
Scripture
“I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions for my own sake; and I will not remember your sins.” —Isaiah 43:25
“Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man to whom the Lord does not impute iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit. … I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I have not hidden. I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and You forgave the iniquity of my sin.” —Psalm 32:1–2, 5
“Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.’” —Luke 23:34
