Answers

By   •   September 19, 2011   •   Topics:

Q:

I thought that in time I'd get over our son's death (in a car accident at the age of 19). But it's been over a year now, and if anything I'm more broken up now than I was when it happened. Why is that? Why can't I stop grieving?


A:

I can understand your heartache; it’s been several years now since Ruth, my wife for almost 64 years, went to be with the Lord. And yet in some ways I miss her even more now than I did when she died.

One reason — especially in your case, since your son’s death was so sudden and unexpected — is that when a loved one dies, we’re almost numb at first. We realize, of course, something terrible has happened, and we may be overwhelmed with grief. But only later does the numbness begin to wear off, and we begin to realize how deep our loss is. Never again will our loved one’s voice be heard; never again will we look up and see them coming into the room.

I’ve found too that as time passes our minds turn away from the immediate fact of their death, and more and more to the memories we have of them. This too prolongs our grief.

My prayer is that you will find your comfort in Christ. God knows what you have been going through, and He loves you and wants to surround you with His peace. If you have never done so, by faith turn to Jesus and ask Him to come into your heart and life today. Then turn your burden of grief over to Him, for His promise is still true: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Matthew 5:4).

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5 Comments

  1. Paul says:

    We lost our 18 year old daughter in a car wreck in Oct. of 2010. She was a Christian. As a Christian I have that blessed assurance that I will see my daughter once again in heaven. We take comfort in God's promises and look forward to that glad day.

  2. Ronisha Says says:

    My cousin died unexpectedly last month at age 28. He was not a christian, and his family was devastated. Please pray for them that God will give them comfort and strength.

  3. Jim says:

    I lost my son 20 years ago. I'm always thinking about him. Every time a friends child gets married, graduates college, has a baby, or does anything, I ache a little from the hurt of missing my son. It does get easier over time, but I love my son and never want to forget him or stop missing him.

  4. Cheryl says:

    We also lost our 19 year old daughter last year to a tragedy. I know that I should be greatly comforted by the fact she loved Jesus with all her heart and left behind journals filled with love letters to Him. Yet, I'm so broken hearted. I miss her! Everyday I come to this site to read Billy's daily devotions and I pray. Everyday God gives me a daily portion of comfort. Kara is with Jesus and her 16 yr old brother needs me to stop crying so much. Lord, help me today.

  5. Han says:

    Sorry to hear that. God is always working and taking care of us. Thank God for we could know Him in Holy Spirit. We have hope in Jesus for He defeating the death. We could help others around us to know Jesus, especially our relatives. In Jesus, even our bodies die, our souls could go to Father. I want to know what is God's mind through the Bible. Moreover, I try to read what Mr. Graham answers everyday. Therefore, I could try to help others in minds of Jesus and share the Love of Jesus. Therefore, Glory will be to Father.