Answers

By   •   February 20, 2008   •   Topics: ,

Q:

We've been married just two years, and already we're over our heads in debt. The problem is that my husband just can't seem to stop spending money, especially when he sees something he wants. But he refuses to face this, and says everything will work out. I'm about to give up.


A:

Unfortunately, your husband seems unwilling to face reality, and I can only hope he realizes this and changes his behavior before it’s too late. Eventually, he will discover that uncontrolled debt is a harsh and cruel master; as the Bible says, “The borrower is servant to the lender” (Proverbs 22:7).

People get into excessive debt for many reasons. Sometimes it’s unavoidable (for example, when heavy medical expenses overwhelm us). But often it’s a result of poor choices we have made, and our inability to say “no” to things we want. In other words, too much debt is often a sign of something deeper: greed. The Bible says greed is a sin, and it inevitably causes problems and conflicts: “A greedy man brings trouble to his family” (Proverbs 15:27).

Have you and your husband ever talked calmly about why he doesn’t seem to be able to say “no” to things he wants? Sometimes, I’ve noticed, people who didn’t have much as a child have a hard time saying no. Or we have a hidden desire to “keep up with the Joneses”–to try to impress others with our wealth.

Whatever the reason, pray for your husband, and seek advice from someone who can help you get on a budget and control your spending. Most of all, commit your lives and your marriage to Christ. When we put Him first, things lose their importance.