By   •   October 3, 2017   •   Topics: ,


My parents fought all the time before they finally got a divorce. Now I worry about getting married, because I know I never learned how to be a good husband or parent. I don't want to end up like they did. How can I get over this fear? Or can I?


Yes, you can get over this fear—and I want to assure you that God not only wants you to get over it, but He wants to help you. May the Psalmist’s experience become yours: “I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears” (Psalm 34:4).

Admittedly your parents weren’t very good examples—but you know it, and that should encourage you! What if you thought that fighting and selfishness were a normal part of marriage? Then you’d have reason to worry—but they aren’t the way God intended marriage to be, and you realize it. Down inside you know marriage ought to be marked by love and compassion and kindness—and God can help this become true in your life. He also can help you overcome your fears and your lack of confidence—and He will, as you allow Him to take control of your life.

This is why I urge you to turn to Jesus Christ and invite Him to come into your life. Do you want to know what true love is? Look at Christ, because by His life and death He demonstrated the true meaning of sacrificial love. The Bible says, “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).

Then learn from the example of others. Learn what it means to put others first instead of yourself; learn too how demonstrate your love in practical ways.

Ask Christ into your heart and life.