I also hope others will learn from your experience, because the road you’ve gone down might look very tempting to them, but (as you’ve discovered) the devil never delivers what he promises. He promises happiness and freedom and excitement but only delivers heartache, slavery and emptiness.
However, as I’ve often said, one of life’s hardest lessons is that we cannot change the past. If you had it to do over again, you’d almost certainly not make the decisions you made. Instead, you’d have done everything you could to keep your marriage together. But you chose to go your own way, and now you’re suffering the consequences. The Bible warns, “Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control” (Proverbs 25:28).
You can’t change the past, but with God’s help you can change the future. God loves you in spite of the way you’ve ignored Him and wants to forgive you and help you get your feet on the right path. Turn to Him and ask Christ to cleanse you and direct you.
I can’t promise everything will suddenly change, but I can promise this: God will be with you, and He will help you as you yield yourself to Him every day. Don’t go down the wrong road again, but commit your life to Christ today.