Answers

By   •   May 15, 2013   •   Topics:

Q:

My neighbor just confessed to me that she's carrying on an affair behind her family's back, and is thinking about leaving them so she can marry her lover (who's also married). I want to help her, but how can I? She claims she's at peace with her decisions.


A:

Your neighbor may have convinced herself that she’s making the right decisions regarding her actions, but someday those decisions will come back to haunt her, for they can only lead to regret and unhappiness and insecurity.

Bad decisions always lead to bad consequences, and right now she’s making some very bad decisions, regardless of what she thinks. Not only will she wreck two families if she goes ahead with this, but she will also be sowing the seeds of her own sorrow — or even destruction.

After all, how does she know this man won’t betray her someday, the same way he’s betraying his own family right now? And she could do the same to him. In other words, the stability and security that God wants for every marriage simply won’t be there — nor can it be. The writer of the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes declared, “I find more bitter than death the woman who is a snare, whose heart is a trap and whose hands are chains” (Ecclesiastes 7:26).

Ask God to give you wisdom, and also to have the courage to confront her with the wrongness of what she’s doing — not only in the eyes of her family but in the eyes of God. Then urge her to turn to Jesus Christ for the forgiveness and new start in life that she needs. Her marriage can be restored — with God’s help, and with the encouragement of friends like you.

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3 Comments

  1. Sue says:

    My father left my mother after 41 yrs. of marriage for another woman, and now he isn't happy with the decision he made. He hurt our family and I don't want to see the hurt that I went through. Please pray for your friend.

  2. Dondi says:

    Myself being the victim of this would love to talk to her. I would tell her -get on your hands and knees and ask God's forgiveness-The poor folks that are going to become the victims will probably never fully recover-for the wrong she/he has done…

  3. Dondi says:

    of my children. There is nothing more painful than the pain she will cause everyone. The devil is the driver on this. He has them both. I will pray for them and for you -I know God will bless you for trying to lead them in the right direction-