Answers

By   •   June 1, 2004   •   Topics:

Q:

I know we're supposed to forgive people who've hurt us, but to be honest I'd rather get even. My ex-husband left me to marry another woman, and now I hear he's secretly playing around with someone else. I'd love to let his current wife know what's really happening. Why shouldn't I? He deserves to suffer.


A:

If you do this, you’ll be driven by anger and a desire to hurt others–and this should be a danger signal to your soul. The Bible warns, “Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9).

You see, God has never promised to bless our anger, nor has He said our lives will be better if we exact revenge on those who have hurt us. In fact, the Bible says the opposite. We only hurt ourselves when we allow anger or bitterness to fester within us. The Bible says, “He who sows wickedness reaps trouble, and the rod of his fury (or anger) will be destroyed” (Proverbs 22:8).

Why is this? The reason is simple: Anger poisons our hearts and minds. It makes us its slaves, and if we don’t look out, it will consume us. I’ve known people who spent every waking hour thinking of ways to get even with someone–and their lives were utterly joyless.

I know you’ve been through a painful time–but so does God. Bring your anger and hurt to the foot of the cross–and leave them there. Then ask Christ to come into your life and fill you with His love. The Bible says, “Do not take revenge, my friends … ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:19).