Answers

By   •   June 1, 2004   •   Topics:

Q:

I can't live with my husband, but I can't seem to live without him either. We've been separated three times, and every time we've gotten back together and tried to make it work. But then we just get on each other's nerves and the cycle starts all over again. Any advice?


A:

The most important thing I can possibly tell you is to build your marriage on Christ. Make Him the foundation and center of your marriage, and you will not only learn to live with each other, but to delight in God’s gift of your marriage.

Have you ever asked yourself what is really wrong in your relationship? From what you say I suspect you do love each other (even if your love isn’t perfect). But I sense you have a deeper problem than just getting irritated with each other. I suspect your real problem is that you both want to have your own needs met, and when that doesn’t happen, you end up fighting.

But what if you made it your goal to meet your husband’s needs–and he made it his goal to meet your needs? That would be true, selfless love–and that is the kind of love God wants to give you. He wants to take away your selfishness, and He wants to fill you with His love. And He will, if you will let Him.

The Bible says, “Love is patient, love is kind … It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5). Begin your marriage again by asking Christ to come into your hearts and fill you with His love today.

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